Hello, again!

Hello, my family of readers and friends, and hello to my birth family as well.

I am far better off  than the last time I wrote.  I  am near completing my time here in the rehab hospital, and have been interviewed  one-time-each by two of local skilled-nursing-facility reps, and my case worker says there will be more.  I’ll b happy to have the choice between many.  The two are 1) Seaside, which is a home on the Back Bay, and 2) St.Joseph’s skilled-nursing facility, which passed state inspections with a higher score in Health Care.  I expect more visitors from other locations, including one from Yarmouth.

My mood is far better than it was this morning.  I continue to remind myself that where I end up will be the right place, and to invite Wisdom into my heart and my choice.  In the meantime, I am still working my butt off, emphasizing on walking, and on regaining strength in my left arm.  Odd to see, I used my left arm and hand far more than I would have known before the stroke, in ordinary motions.  I pedaled on an arm-bike today, and that wore me out, but I am staying awake, so that when my head hits the pillow, I fall asleep.

So, all goes well here, and I hope that is true for all of you .  Thanks for all your comments and support!

Much love to all.

GREETINGS!

Me, at RehabHello, my readers and friends! You haven’t heard much from me in the last few weeks. At first, I took a break because I did’t know what to write, and over the last ten-or–so days I have been in the hospital, severely ill.

I had a small stroke. My speech has returned to nearly normal, although my pace is wrong, and my tongue still feels larger than the inside of my mouth.

More seriosly affected is my left arm, which remains mostly numb, although I expect to make progress in rehab, where I go tomorrow. Most notable, however, were the visions I experienced during the first day in ICU.  I believed I was among a group of pre-Islsam African scholars, treated with respect, (as though a member of the tribe,) and encouraged to participate  in the exchange of intellectual and philosophical ideas.  The stretching of my mind during this time remains, but I will need some time to sort through some stuff — eventually I will write of it.

I left the hospital this afternoon, and now reside in NewEngland Rehab Hospital.  I have to mention all the help and attention from my youngest sister, M.  She is steadfast, and she helps me prepare for the coming weeks, physically and emotionally.  Thanks, M.!  In fact, all of my family and many of my friends assist me through these tough first days, and many of them  have volunteered one of  their kidneys.  Amazing; that’s how that feels!

Forgiving myself, again

How unhappy is he who cannot forgive himself.

–Publilius Syrus
(http://www.zentactics.com/forgiveness-quotes.html

I thought about self-forgiveness today, on my way home from the nephrologist.  In my life, self-forgiveness has come in stages.  I remembered this today, when I visited the doctor.  She was full of good news — the result of this month’s lab tests was excellent, and all my numbers were within limits, although some were on the ragged edge of high or low. Continue reading

Keystone Progress Daily Funnies

Keystone Progress Daily Funnies

If you’re not laughing, you’re not paying attention. Every day, we search for the funniest comics and videos on the issues of the day.

Rob Rogers, Sunday, June 8, 2014

by Rob Rogers

by Rob Rogers

The Keystone Progress Daily Funnies are brought to you thanks to our partnership with Uclick.com /Gocomics.com.

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Saturday Gratitude Post 6/7/2014

Welcome to my Saturday Gratitude Post.  Before I begin, I enjoy writing this post almost every week; may I suggest that some of you might enjoy writing a gratitude post weekly.  No rules, no themes.  Simply a post about your life and the blessings you experienced the previous week.

I am grateful for so many blessings, big and small, that touched me this week.  I am feeling very healthy, losing a little weight and, surprisingly, I’m not having difficulty sticking to the renal diet.  As a result, my blood sugars are far better, and I look relatively shapely right now.  I am so grateful that I am fighting myself all the time when I am caring for my body and my health.

Our weather is glorious — bright blue sky in the morning and early afternoon, then clouds and rain in the middle of the day, and finally back to clear skies for the latter part of the day.  Each day like this is a gift, and I spend a lot of time outdoors.  What a treat after such a long winter!

Someone is mowing grass outside, that lovely smell of cut grass blowing into my living room — a smell that, for me, embodies all the glories of summer.

Mom is much more contented, and enjoying an overall sense of good health, though her knees still bother her if she sits too long in the wrong chair.  The rest of the family is doing well; J., my next younger sister, lives with her family just north of San Diego.  The fire doesn’t usually reach their block, but they are close enough to unsettle nerves.  Nevertheless, J. is home with her husband M. and their daughter M., who just finished a successful year in college, and who will be dancing at SeaWorld this summer.

The rest of my family are happy, busy, and enjoying Spring.  My older sister can finally get into the pool, and that must feel like a little slice of heaven.  My brother’s son and daughter  serving  in their respective stations.  S. is at sea, and I wish I was there, too.  I love being on the ocean.  C2. is thriving down in Maryland —  she will be a wonderful doctor/nurse/medic or anything else she pursues. My brother’s oldest daughter is closer to home, trying and outgrowing ever retail job she’s had.  I know that she will decide where she belongs soon — C1 is a strong young woman.  Finally, my sister DB’s younger daughter, left high school after four remarkably interesting years, after several successful theater performances in which she shone.

I start back to work this Wednesday, and I can hardly wait.  Funny how four little hours a week are so important — I look forward to seeing my fellow workers, and all the customers I see at the register.  I am at least strong enough for one day, and that is all I am working this week.  I hope to work two days next week.

Life is good.  D. and I took a big swipe out of the living room last week, disassembling my altar and giving away anything I no longer use.  We cleared off the dining room table and put all of my pump supplies in a big drawer in the kitchen, which I should have done at the very beginning.  What a difference a clean table makes.

My life is so full of joyful goals.  D. and I know the balance we each need for the cruise.  I am not really very close, actually, but I have four more months, which will mean at least $400 in savings.  I saw a program about Belize today, and the teal and aqua water just called to me.  I am practicing patience!

This is only a small section of my Gratitudes list.  I am a very lucky woman indeed.

40th Anniversary

40 years ago, on June 4, 1974, a Navy pediatrician diagnosed my  juvenile diabetes, (Type 1.)

In 1974, diabetes was a very frightening condition, not easily tracked, and believed to be an unavoidable path to leg amputations and blindness.  The doctor told me, with no equivocation, that my life would be short and difficult.  On that same day, the doctor told my parents not to get involved with my struggles with daily living, lest I become dependent on them.  I was 14-years-old.

I wrote in this blog about that day at least 2 times.  I will try to find those posts, but here is a synopsis of the results of that huge change in my life.  I gained much of this knowledge in just the last few years:

I didn’t feel badly, in the first 6 months.  I applied my intellect to the problem, and stuffed the feelings.  I learned to inject insulin into my body.  At that time, no home glucose monitors existed; I peed in a cup, put some in a glass test tube, and tested for ketones.  That was the only indicator that my blood glucose was high, and I needed the doctor to tell me what dose of insulin I should be taking.  This was animal insulin — no chemically recreated human insulin for years.

After the first six months, I began to feel depressed more and more, and a feeling of who cares came over me.  I didn’t overcome that feeling for longer than a few years at a time.  I was married and divorced three times, always blaming him when the problems were often mine.

I couldn’t keep a job for more than two or three years; many of my jobs lasted less than a year.  I was, (please pardon the cliche,) rudderless.  Not until I settled here, alone and miserable, did I finally face up to my own character and behavior.  That was when everything started to smooth out.

So I remember a lifetime full of carelessness, but now I am intentional about what I think and what I expect from myself. I received enormous, intense and life-changing blessings throughout my life, and I am grateful for them every day.  I accept my family just as each member is, and I love them all dearly.  I have made friends who are good for me, and I cherish them.  I look forward to waking up in the morning; I feel and see and focus on different situations in my life, but, overall, I am content.  I love my life, and I strive to maintain that love through my daily ups and downs.

So all is well.